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the dream within the dream

Bloged in apprenticeship, community by rod Tuesday November 1, 2005

This morning during the rocking motion between sleeping and waking, I had a dream within a dream. Even the fact that I was dreaming within my dream was significant. To have a dream inspired or delivered in a dream is at least symbolic. In this experience, I got in trouble for something and sensed that I was in trouble even though I didn’t know what it was for. The sensation was correct, and I woke twice thinking, “phew, it was only a dream.”
I think the whole thing was an amalgam of conversations and experiences that Allison and I had during the weekend. Some of the conversations had to do with me sensing things about people that they don’t know themselves, understanding things about people that they don’t understand. Sometimes an encounter causes something to pass between people of whom perhaps only one is aware. Often - I am sure of it - the one from whom it passed would never have given it away. Sometimes, I feel I can see into the mind, other times I see into the heart. It is almost always vague or opaque like a sound that you hear on the other side a fence but can’t tell what it is, or a smell of which you can’t know the source.
Anyway, that was the gist of some conversation between Allison and me, but it doesn’t really tell you about the dream. But that was vague too, because it also had to do with sensing. The dream had less to do with sensing things about people and more to do with perceiving a lost course. They are related because people follow courses, and because it has to do with the desire to correct something that is askew. I sense things in people and acquire a desire to help rid them of a source of pain, or an encumbrance.
I think that the fact that I was dreaming in my dream, was a symbolic play on the concept of “dream”. The inner dream was symbolic of “vision”, and idea, a drive. In the dream that encased it, I was actually acting on it, radically and suddenly because it affected a lot of people and a lot of people responded. I saw myself having vision and acting on it – two simultaneous levels.
I wondered if I abuse an ability to perceive, sense and see and understand some things by merely trying to pass the understanding along so that someone else will take action. I constantly battle between the feeling that the path needs correcting, and that a new flight plan needs to be drawn. What is the difference between reform and revolution? Adjusting, or starting over? Is it a nuance? Or a gulf?
In my dream, I acted upon a very real burden that I feel all the time. I acted upon it in a very different way than I have been responding to it. I saw that my subversion had laid a ground work for the next step out of the shadows.
There is only so much you can do to treat symptoms. Often treatment of symptoms provides just enough temporary relief to ignore the underlying condition so that it worsens until the symptoms just can’t be treated any longer.

5 Responses to “the dream within the dream”

  1. Kingfisher Says:

    I used to think that discernment meant that I needed to take some action on behalf of another. I am beginning to think that it is so that I will be there and be understanding and supportive when the person with the issue decides its time to take action. Both require something of me but the latter approach calls for a greater sense of timing.

  2. AL Says:

    Symptomatic treatment may be the tool of evil. Keep you just comfortable enough to not take action….Now to just take a deep breath of faith and plunge in for the cure.

  3. Wingman Says:

    Remember what your mentor told you about being true to yourself? Those around you benefit most when you are true to your own art and your own being. The overflow from that is more valuable than your trying to completely give yourself to them. I have thought about this a good bit lately. I certainly am finding it to be true for me as I flop around in the various modes. I wonder if this all applies to the current situation? Maybe you need to do what will bring peace to your own soul and let the blessing flow from that rather than to sacrifice that soul. The dynamics of the ability to give and the ability to receive are very different in these different modes. Another thing to consider: When you have some semblence of inner peace, the springs keep flowing. The complete sacrifice mode has a limited life. You can only do that for so long before either your spirit, your body, or your mind breaks and then you may not be much good to anybody.

  4. Sid Says:

    I pray all the time….”Dearest Jesus, I know you, right? Don’t you have the ability to ’sense things in people’ and don’t you ‘acquire a desire to help rid them of a source of pain, or an encumbrance?’ Would you do that for me today?”

    Rod, your gift is the magnificant privledge of leading in worship (through many ways other than music)…I don’t really have a comment about the way the Lord revealed these things in your dream, but I know he gives continual knowledge of himself through making us like Him even when we aren’t aware of the change. It’s funny, but you’ve done this in my life many times. I don’t think this would sound appropriate if I didn’t know you and Alison know my heartt….but you tend to look deeply into my eyes when I pass you and something inside me wants to follow. I want to know what you know because I know you know Jesus better than me.

  5. Bluemama Says:

    There are many reasons why some can see what others cannot. And when you can see a flower fetus struggling for breath, there is a Always a very specific reason why. We can get all kinds of advice as to what to do with a particular understanding, and sadly we often do not handle insight well, especially when we bear it alone. It can weigh very heavy on us and we are then tempted to share so it does not feel so heavy. Sometime this is good and sometimes not so good. When we are one with Him in the moment we will know exactly what we need to see, hear and feel and we will know.

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